Mother's Day Can Be A Brutal Beast
If you're struggling to find the joy in Mother's Day, rest assured you're not alone.
Motherhood can be a thankless gig, but on this one day a year when Hallmark tells the children of the world to up the anti in the ‘recognition of mum’ department, that all changes…. right?
A few things certainly shift for a day. The pressure on partners to make mum feel valued certainly goes up a notch, the suggestion for kids to act like angels echos throughout homes (although often falls on deaf ears), and the expectation that mothers feel blessed, loved and appreciated bears down heavily on the shoulders of many a tired soul.
The thing is, motherhood is very rarely an Insta-worthy pic, a postcard moment, or bloody rainbows and unicorns. It’s sleepless nights, a body that no longer seems to belong to you, a bottomless pit of dirty laundry, meals that aren’t eaten, tantrums, never-ending questions, and stories that go on and on and on. Motherhood is sore nipples, a dwindling social circle, financial pressure and fatigue. These things don’t simply stop on one magical day of the year, because motherhood doesn’t stop… ever.
On this day when social media tells stories of happy mothers basking in the love and admiration of their nearest and dearest, know that for many mums the day whispers of much more.
Women who’ve lost their mothers, single mums, step-mums, new mums, tired mums, unhappy mums… for all these mums, today might feel a little tainted. For these mums, today might remind them of the hard parts of motherhood, for which there are many.
So if you are this mum today, the mum struggling to find the light and love in the Hallmark creation that is Mother’s Day, know you are not alone in feeing ‘meh’. Instead of trying to create that picture perfect pic for your social feed, instead look for the gratitude in the small moments - which I assure you are always there, they’re just sometimes hidden by the fog of fatigue.
This morning I got to enjoy a little bit of time with my sons and step-sons. There weren’t extravagant presents or grand gestures, but there were pancakes, double cream and blueberries, and for that I am beyond grateful.